Obsession @ 8:49 pm.

Last Night.. your last seen was at 8:49 …

I had texted you at 7:12 that I love you…

At 8:14 I had kissed you…

At 8:52 I was angry cz you had come online but you didn’t see…

At 9:06 I was worried…

At 9:30 I called you which u didn’t pick…

I was sad again at 9:31…

I was again angry at 10:30 because you didn’t pick my call at 10:20….

I forwarded you a text you would have liked…

I kept on checking your last seen till late at night…

You said you are out partying with a friend…

But she came online.. 5 times between 8:49 and 2:10…

I didn’t text her cz it would have been a breach of privacy..

something we agreed upon recently…

I was running all the scenarios in my head…

From you being drunk to being dead…

My obsession was growing by every minute…

I checked your last seen every two minutes…and then one..

In order to keep myself sane

I decided to do something insane…

I opened YouTube to watch FRIENDS…

And there it was Ross shouting…

“We were on a Break”

Though we had a fight a few days back…

But I know that we were NOT on break…

That we ARE not on a break…

I closed the video as my hands turned cold and my ears turned red…

It happens when anxiety starts hitting me in the head…

I made another mistake… I opened FACEBOOK…

To see the post which said…

“Know 13 signs when your girlfriend cheats on you…“

Was the universe giving me a sign…

Now my thoughts were not at bay…

I closed Facebook to switch to messenger…

To be circled with now known strangers…

I pinged a friend whose First name I didn’t remember…

Because he was the only online member…

I came to know about the snow storm in the France that night…

And here was lava boiling inside me with every passing moment that night…

I decided to close my eyes and meditate myself to sleep…

Just to wake the blaring storm that was asleep…

I could picture you in every way…

Like RON saw Hermione with Harry when Horcrux was at play…

I am no Ron and yet I fought with every thought…

Because I wanted to settle that storm…

But I couldn’t…

My body was trembling…

My hands were sweaty…

I could feel the heat coming out of me…

My ears were red…

because I saw myself in the mirror next to me…

I took deep breaths to cool myself down…

Though it was ironic as I was living in a freezing town…

Somehow I drifted to sleep…

To wake to my internal storm…

It was morning and you were nowhere to be seen…

And now pieces were falling into place…

My thoughts were taking over the trust I had in you…

I wished you to come online before it clocked 2….

Because the hotel room is generally booked till 1

And you take an hour to eat after a night’s run…

I know it because… I have been there…

I had to write a mail for my job posting…

I had to write an article for publishing…

I checked your last seen instead…

I meticulously searched Facebook for your Check In…

I went through Instagram to realise that I am not following…

I foolishly kept on switching between the three…

It took me a lot of strength to crawl out of the bed…

To take a bath and feed myself that stale bread…

As the clocked ticked 2…

I decided to write my ordeal through…

At 2:10 my phone buzzed and I knew it was you…

And this poem was just half way through…

I decided to write before I see what kept you…

Cz i know I will believe you…

Not because you love me…but because I love you…

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7 comments

  1. Amazing… Interesting to read something great after a long time… Tune up with all these… All the best…
    This poetic story reminds me about myself 😂…

    Like

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